Please don't take this the wrong way. I'm grateful for the people in my life that love my kids and want to buy them Christmas gifts. But please, for the love of god, just read this list and avoid the gifts below that make us parents want to rip our hair out.
1) Noisy Toys.
Do you know what my kids are? Living, breathing noise machines. They make noise 24/7, it's like they take shifts keeping me up at night. I'm sure they make a master plan as they brush their teeth to make sure I only get 20 mins of sleep straight. The last thing I need is a noisy toy. Not only does that toy just add to my chaos but there is nothing creepier than hearing a toy say "Ma-Ma" from deep within the toy box. The general rule could be; If it has batteries, we don't want it.
Better Option: Anything else. For real. Absolutely anything else.
Hint for moms: When that noisy toy gets unwrapped put duct tape on the speaker, it muffles the volume enough to tolerate it till the battery dies.
2) Christmas Dresses
It's either Christmas day or 3 days before Christmas. Do you think I'm that unorganized that I haven't thought about getting an uncomfortable crinoline infused dress for my daughter? (Don't answer that.) If you don't see it on her it's because I decided to...I don't know...buy something practical or maybe she'll wear it for 10 mins for photos before any food goes into her mouth and destroys it. Either way that ship has sailed and getting a dress that's only good for one occasion is basically like flushing your money down the toilet.
Better Option: Just buy her regular old clothes. I know they aren't as precious or fun to buy, but they'll get way more use out if it. (Please, for the love of god, just ask what size they are first - all 6 year olds are not size 6, contrary to popular belief.)
Hint for moms: When you inevitably get the frilly dress let them use it for dress up clothes. "Look now you can be a princess all year round!" We do this with every fancy dress my daughter's ever worn, flower girl dresses and all. If I spent $100 on a dress it might as well get worn, right?
3) Stuffed Animals
In my opinion stores should just stop selling these altogether. I'm sure there are enough stuffed animals in the world to give one to every child for the next 50 years. Can you guess how many my child actually uses? One. Yet, I could fill an entire room with the stuffed animals we've received. The chances your stuffed animal will be the one they hand down to their children is so slim, I'm begging you not to try. Side note: If you get something insanely over-sized I refuse to even pretend to be happy, you'll see the rage all over my face.
Better Option: An age appropriate puzzle or game. Something that will get my kids thinking and learning important skills like reasoning and taking turns.
Hint for moms: Donate them to the hospital. Parents that lose babies need something to go home with. My daughter has slept with Maya Bear for 4 years and it meant a lot to us after our loss.
4) Anything That Hangs on the Wall.
I strongly urge you to rethink that giant canvas you're about to purchase. Parents know that kid's interests change faster than you can say "ninja turtles". Every time a new movie is released my kids get obsessed, that doesn't mean that I want to cover their walls in Spongebob Squarepants paraphernalia.
Better Option: Buy the movie or book! If they like it that much I'm sure they'd love to watch or read it 1 million times, until the next big thing comes along, of course.
Hint for moms: Hopefully you have a playroom where you can hide it. If not, try selling that piece of...umm..art on kijiji. Maybe someone is looking for an enormous Pokemon print?
|This is not a toy. It's a torture device.|
Better Option: How about some music classes? Much better way to spend your money. (Disclaimer: Please consult parents before adding said music classes into an already busy schedule.)
Hint for moms: Re-gift! Just don't make eye-contact with that poor mom in your kids class who is the lucky recipient. My apologies, in advance...